Behind Those Eyes-Ms. Happiness & An Award!

I feel good and back to myself for the most part after surgery two weeks ago. Just have to watch the sleeping in thing...caught myself still in bed at 9am the other day and scared myself when I woke up!! Good thing I had nowhere to be that morning. :) You can get away with it when you have NO children at home and a hubby who heads off to work early everyday. :)

I'm late with my online bible study...Say Yes to God hosted by Lelia at Write From the Heart. We are studying the book "Behind Those Eyes" by Lisa Whittle. Lisa even joins us and gives us encouragment. If you'd like to join or read the insight of others doing the study...you can check it all out at Lelia's site here!

Chapter 4: Ms. Happiness

This was a hard chapter for me to write something down about.  I've started a couple times.

On page 59, Lisa writes~A lot of things can make us feel happy for a time.  But a lot of things can also let us down almost as quickly as they perked up up.  I can relate to that.  It happens daily that we let little things make us happy for a time.  I don't think I've relied on things or people really to make me happy.   I've been a pretty content person most of my life and look at the positive side of things.  I am a pretty happy person.  I attribute that to being a child of God and holding very high morals. (Sometimes to the detriment of missing out on a bit of fun!)  I became a believer in Junior High and rededicated my life to the Lord as a senior in high school.  I married a believer and we were blessed to sit under one of the godliest pastors I have ever known and I grew in my faith.  We have always been involved in our church, yearned for that deeper walk with HIM and for the most part have relied on the Lord for his care of us.  We have not had an easy 30 years of married life but we work at it.  We always come back together and focus on what God's word says.  I would have to say I have never focused on being HAPPY.  I have put on the mask of happiness when I wasn't for a period of time.

Lisa also writes that the true and lasting source of our joy that fills our hearts and overflows into the paths of those around us.  When we go to the real source of joy, we find the answers we need to secure our contentment in life forever.  I took to heart this verse long ago when I was at a ladies bible study.  I actually put the verse in my husband's lunch and he quit his job the next day to start his own business.  It is:  Philippians 4:11-13~Not that I speak from want:  for I have learned to be content in whatever circumstances I am.  I know how to get along with humble means and I also know how to live in prosperity; in any and every circumstance I have learned the secret of being filled and going hungry, both of having abundance and suffering need.  I can do all things through HIM who strengthens me.  

I took this verse to heart and it has helped me through each and every circumstance.

I take Lisa's prayer to heart as well...it is my prayer today.

Father God, we are women who desire to find joy, fulfillment, and peace in life.  We know that only You can provide these things.  But we admit we have sought other sources to make us happy, and they have only brought us temporary feelings of fulfillment.  You are our joy, and we seek YOU as our only way to be the happy women we want to be.  In Jesus' name.  AMEN.

This week I received my first bloggy award from Heidi. which just happens to fall in line with our Ms. Happiness chapter above because they give you that happy feeling for a short time. This reward requires you to name six things that make you happy! You will need to check out her blog when you want a laugh(go potty first if you are over 45!) or to see the cutest kiddos in Georgia!

Six things that make me happy:

1. My family~hubby, children and grandchildren

2. Sitting on the beach reading a magazine and listening to the ocean.

3. Looking at picture albums~I love looking at pictures!!! I also love taking pictures and sharing them with friends and family.

4. Learning something new from the Bible and applying it to my life. It gives me peace, joy and happiness.

5. Knowing that my children know the Lord and have grown up to be responsible adults attempting to make it on their own. I am proud of each of them!

Thanks for the award Heidi.  Please go here for a good laugh and here is another one and here one more.  You can also read about her precious son and daughter and her crazy husband who makes her laugh and makes her happy most of the time.  I'm supposed to link to 6 other blogs that make me happy but I've run out of time.  I've gotta get to bed as we leave for Chicago tomorrow and I still have to pack and get my nails done!  So Debbie, Nina Diane, Brandee, Carol, Carrie(Buzzings of a Queen Bee) and anyone else who reads my blog and comments, feel free to enjoy the award courtesy of me.  I'm off to bed...it's 1:20am!  I can't sleep in tomorrow!

Behind Those Eyes-Ms. Confidence

This is a part of an online Bible Study-Yes to God.  We are studying the book "Behind Those Eyes" by Lisa Whittle.   If you'd like to join in,  get the book and go over to Lelia at Write From the Heart who hosts the study to link up with everyone.  You will be blessed and changed.

Chapter 3-Miss Confidence

This is me!  I have become Ms. Confidence since I came out of my shell years ago.  I used to be shy and just wait to be included in everything.  Sadly I was not noticed.  So years ago, I began to get out of my comfort zone and became more outgoing and more confident.  I had always been pretty smart, had a great smile, etc.  However, over the years, I became the Ms. Confidence that would let very few people inside the real me!  I wanted to save myself the pain of being hurt by others seeing the real me.  

On page 43, Lisa writes:  Often, women I become good friends with tell me they admire my confidence and strength.  Because of my type A personality, I tend to choose friends who are a bit more laid back and emotional than I am.  I relate to this so well...I also saw myself in the crisis times where they would call me but I couldn't bring myself to call them for advice on the really personal things.  Believe me, I had picked up the phone, started an email, etc. wanting to ask for help but couldn't.  

Finally...a true crisis hit that I could not hide from.   My son came home and said his girlfriend was pregnant!!  I was devastated...for him, for me, our family, our reputation, he was brought up in a Christian family, went to Christian school and he knew better.  I blamed her!  This was NOT what I had planned for his life.  I cried and went into a bit of a depression.  I could not talk about it.  I could NOT tell anyone for a couple months.  I denied it was real.  I was angry at my son, at God, at myself, at MTV, everyone!  Thank God for pastors who preach God's word and husbands who insist we go to church every Sunday.  It was through a message one Sunday that I felt God take this burden from me and tell me that it was going to be okay and  I needed to share this burden, that I would be okay, not to worry about what others thought and to love my son, his girlfriend, my husband and to be dependant on GOD and not myself.   It was not easy to call my mom, my dad, my mother-in-law, my sisters, my brother, etc. and tell them the news.  God is good.  He paved the way for Dallas and Selena and my precious little Bella who I love sooooo much to make it through this.  Today Dallas and Selena have been through alot....married, divorced, they became pregnant again--Dylan is 6 months old and such a sweetie! and soon to be married.  They attend church together and my prayer is for them to grow in their faith and to LOVE one another.  So girls....here I am sharing with all of you my real story...it's getting easier.  God is growing me and I'm becoming more Real so that I can truly serve HIM better.

Lisa says:  So while my friends may admire me for my strength and counsel, the truth is I admire them....women who are open(like Lelia) and vulnerable and real and genuine and without pretense.  Those are the things that truly take strength.  Amen to that!

On page 50:  We were not made to live in a completely self-reliant state, regardless of how empowering it sounds.  After all Jesus acknowledged our human weakness when he said, "I am the vine; you are the branches.  If a man remains in me and I in him, he will bear much fruit; apart from me you can do nothing"  John 15:5  True confidence comes down to who our confidence is in, where it lies, and why we have the confidence to begin with.  This is the kind of confidence I want to have from now on.  

  Dear Lord, 

We admit that as capable as we may be, we cannot be truly confident without the power of the Holy Spirit in our lives...leading us and directing us in our everyday circumstances.  Our desire is that we begin to be transparent before you and those around us, admitting our vulnerabilities and helping others feel the freedom to, in turn, get real.  

In Jesus' name, AMEN.  

This was the prayer at the end of the Bible Study guide.  This is my prayer today!

Behind those Eyes

I am participating in an on-line Bible Study with a group of women from all over the US and abroad each Tuesday as we work our way through the book called:  "Behind Those Eyes", by Lisa Whittle.  I will be posting my thoughts as best I can on the chapter we study that week.  My blog will be linked to Lelia who is hosting this bible study so that you can read what the other women have learned from this study as well.  

Chapter 2:  Ms. Perfection

This chapter starts out with a family getting ready for church on Sunday morning and what it takes to get ready for that perfect entrance.  That even though things have been hectic and we've been arguing with our spouse, short with the kids, that we ALL put on the face of everything is perfect even down to what we are wearing.  

We had so many of those mornings over the years and we felt bad putting on our perfect family faces and voices but it's what you do.  I know God was not pleased  most of the mornings with our actions but was pleased that we were going to worship and fellowship. 

My conviction this week was from pg 31 where Lisa writes..."Ladies, we act like a perfect wife more than we actually are one." Oh my....yes...this is a struggle for me..my hubby and I think so differently.  He is the more emotional one and I am the black and white one.  After 30 years, we are still learning to communicate.  Because of my Ms. Perfection personality traits, I didn't always let loose and have fun. What would people think???  I am now finally letting loose more...my boys have helped with that but now my husband is learning to live with the new me.  I am trying to be a better wife NOT a perfect one!

Lisa wrote on page 37 ..."I am not perfect, and I don't try to be anymore.  Trying to be perfect is so exhausting, and there never an end to it."  AMEN to that...It took me a long time and lots of stress to realize that I CANNOT do it ALL!!  I cannot compare myself to the woman who can do more than me, looks greater than me, volunteers for everything and still has it together.  I am me and I am ok with it!

Our Challenge Question:  Search your heart.  Is it more important for you to be seen as perfect in a certain area...or seen as real?  I think we need to be real to make a difference for Christ.  How can we share Christ if we are not real?  I still struggle to be real because I don't want to be hurt, or talked about or seen as weak.  I'm working on it though and letting people in to my life on a deeper level.  On that note...I go in for surgery tomorrow...please pray for my nervousness as this is my first surgery ever and for the doctor's hand to do the operation right and for quick healing. Thank you.

Thank you Lelia for hosting this study and for being real!  Love ya,  Connie